Obama bama bama bama bama Chameleon

Watch them clap as he walks out. Rich Little he is not.

I loved it when Obama was running for the president of these United States. He was using the Martin Luther King voice for most of them but as we can see he is a diverse impressionist.

We saw him use the famous finger pointing when he was trying a new impression of John F. Kennedy, but I have to hand it too the man, he got the Reagan speech pattern down pat, it is his act he needs to work on. He also tried his hand at Don Rickles when he attacks Bush so many times throughout these speeches, it almost souns as if he may want a job at MSNBC.

His sidekicks, the act of Pelosi and Biden needs to work on their routines because their impression on the Supremes was just awful. Pelosi stood up too much and Biden not enough but maybe itwasn’t Diana Ross and the Supremes he was after, maybe he was doing the Marx Brothers? oh man, now I get it, Pelosi, Biden and Obama, the New three Stooges.

Obama, Biden and Pelosi are sitting in the oval office reading the liberal news papers. They look well dressed and as calm as can be. The phone rings and it is Michelle wondering if she can repeper the walls in her private bathroom. Obama tells her not to call anyone because Pelosi, Biden, and himself will indeed do this job themselves. The next thing you know, Biden has his head in a bucket of paste, Obama is slapping the heck out of him as he tries to get his foot out of the waiste basket while Pelosi writes the bill for another job well done. Oh well.

I am looking forward to seeing what other surprises Obama and his sidekicks have in store for us. It is a treat I must say because I miss the old acts and the voices are a nice touch. I think he is working on his Richard Prior as we speak.

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My About Me Blog

I was a Rhodes scholar, when I was eight my mother told me to hit the roads, the ones with traffic on them. I began as a humorist at the ripe old age of twelve. I wrote, recorded, and produced a play for cassette at the age of thirteen and called it, “Reality in the Mind of an Idiot,” over tracking on two tape recorders acting all the voices myself. I wrote three radio spots for a local New Jersey Radio station when I was fourteen which aired for two years. I started doing stand-up at the age of fifteen which landed me a roll on a local UHF television show called, The Uncle Floyd Show.” I have punched up many comedians routines back in the day; my nickname was punchy, now it is just Jerk, or Hey you.

These days, I write for many publications and have twelve published books out there somewhere. I blog for fun and I write because I love doing it. I have a few very old routines on YouTube. One character of mine, ‘Finga’s, my right hand man,” can be seen on a cold medicine commercial. I wrote for many New York radio shows a while back but decided to concentrate on my writing these days. Once in a great while, when asked I will punch up some of my friend’s comedy routines but my books come first. The blog you are about to read, is my take on life. Some things are funny, some aren’t. It depends on the mood I am in. My books vary. Sometimes I write comedy, sometimes, I write thrillers, but whatever I am working on, I hope it makes you think. They say, you come into this world alone and naked and you die alone and naked. Hey, I just like saying naked. My wish in life is to take my small cult following and create something people can remember.

Back in the day I was known as DiCat. I aways wondered if their was anyone out there with the nickname, Nick? “There he goes, trying to be funny again.” Look, I am not a fragile man. If you think I am silly, stupid, or nuts, let me know, I wont be crushed. I am psychic but never display those thoughts very much. I quit trying to make believers out of people years ago and keep that part of my life private for the most part. I think it was in 1975 when a friend of mine argued with me that there were no such thing as psychic’s. I turned to him and asked him to answer the door. He told me no one rang the bell but a few seconds later, low and behold someone we hadn’t seen in a few years was standing there and his jaw droped. He never doubted me after that.

My favorite book I have written is “Growing Up Goomba.” It is fiction and non fiction. I tell my tale about where and how I grew up in Newark, New Jersey while mafia thugs teach you how to be just like them and live the life. We take turns telling our stories. I had a guy, I think he was on the Sopranos, Steve Schirripa who had written a book a few years after I wrote Goomba, he told me I stole the word Goomba from him. We had a fued for a while but I shut him up after I told him my age. I have been using words like Goomba a lot longer then he had. I also had a scuffle with the Gotti’s “Growing Up Gotti” until they realized that my book title was out long before their television show. By the way, goomba or Goombada really means, Godfather in Italian, and Goomada is Godmother but American/Italian slang would change it to someone close to you, like a good friend, someone who has your back no matter what.” Hey Goombahda.” The Godfather walks up to one of his capo’s and kisses him on the mouth. The Capo leaves the party afraid and shaking. Everyday he checks under the hood of his car, looks over his shoulder, and is afraid for his life knowing very well when the Godfather kisses someone on the mouth it is the kiss of death. The next week the Godfather walks up to his capo again and notices he is a shaken man. ‘My son, why do you fear me so?” the Godfather asks. The guy explains to him. The Godfather said, “Ha ha, look, Charlie, I don’t want to kill you, I want to bang you. I explain to people when they ask if I ran down south after 911. I tell them I am witness protected. I was relocated to South Carolina. I don’t really care who knows where I am for one simple reason, I fear no man, women yes but men no.

For those who think my spelling sucks, well, I work alone, I edit myself, I am dyslexic so I do the best I can with the tools I was handed from God. I am hated by most publishers because of some trouble I got into which will remain my trouble not yours. I am not welcome in the writing community because of my innovative ideas. The only club I am a member of is the side of right. I am not a bible pusher, nor am I a demon. I try to be original and never jump on any band wagon, I just refuse to do that. As I said before, I have loads of books out there somewhere, Amazon, Target, Ebookmall.com, lulu.com WB and have written over a million stories for many publications in the last forty some odd years. I punch up comedy for a few comedians but don’t really make a practice of that these days for one simple reason, they don’t tell others about me to keep me working for them. My only job these days, is writing books although an offer my way wont be out of the question, (hint, hint) I am not flawless, we all learn from out mistakes and for me, I am still learning. My brightest moment was when something I had written was on MSNBC.com but pulled that same day due to my opinions about a certain talk show hoe, oops, host, which will remain nameless but I can say her name rhymes with Okra Wind Free. I auditioned to be on a show called Fridays, and SNL but was turned down years ago. I told a friend of mine that I am turned down by the best, thats how I do business. I was a ghost writer on about thirty five books, some very popular, some not. I have written for loads of television, (punch up work)

So, thats about it, I am open for questions so feel free to e-mail me anytime. ( authorbobbyd@yahoo.com ) I do accept bribes, I come cheap so any offer will be taken under close consideration. My best advise to anyone reading this is advise that was given to me by Lenny Bruce when I was ten years old, Lenny Bruce told me, “Never be a name dropper.”

People seem to dislike me. They hate me with a passion but I don’t mind because of things I say and do. I know who I am, I say what I feel, I don’t stalk behind ones back. I think people are afraid to face the truths in their daily lives. I show them what is real, sometimes using humor and other times being serious. To be honest, my books do not sell, I am not a rich man, and I am always looking for new things to do. I do what I want when I want to and this and this alone is why people are afraid to read my work.

My greatest moment in life wasn’t anything I have written, but getting to meet some of the people I have admired through life. Harry Nilsson, who I got to be friends with before his death, The Firesign Theatre members, who I still stay in contact with through e-mail, Al Lewis, sitting with him at his resturant in the Village in NY, Soupy Sales, who said, show me a guy that is crazy as a loon and I’ll show you Caterino, not to mention others, so I wont. I had a blessed life.

To me, the difference of opinion is what makes us great. I can see things in the past, present, and future as you will soon see in my blogs here which will scare the pants off you. You don’t have to agree with my thoughts but you must admit when I am right. I also love a good debate but when the haters come, and there will be many just laugh at them as I do. They will have nothing to really add except for the name calling. I have for the most part, had many nice people comment me on my work as for the others, they just like busting my chops which I don’t mind, hey, I am Italian after all so I can take it. Since my first book, I have sold a few million, my goal so long ago was to sell one. (No one in my family, brothers, sisters, uncles, nephews, never read anything I have written in forty years, they said, “You can’t write.” To be fair,most of my family told me I couldn’t do lots of things I have done.

I am working on another horror thriller called “The Mindling”. it should be out mid summer when you order it, make sure you have a change of underwear.

I just finished THE WHITE HOUSE MAFIA, a political book about present times we are facing. I hope if you decide to read it, that you will learn something about this Country and those who are trying to end it as we know it. It can be found at:
Click here

Feel free to visit and see the sample.
Thanks and stay safe.

Al’s Sharp Tongue at it Again

Al Sharpton, at it again. The man makes money keeping racism alive even if it isn’t truth. He will go out of his way to create a situation and create mayhem to keep his business alive.

You all know his latest, a cartoon that might have been in bad taste, because most of us love animals and would never make fun of that. He is telling us that this was a racist statement when all it really was saying is that Congress has a job so easy that even a monkey can do it. If I was to create a cartoon with three Obama’s in it, one Obama was covering his ears and the caption read, “Hear no evil,” the next caption said, “see no evil” and the third said, “well, two out of three aren’t bad,” I am sure Sharp Tongue, would be all over me saying that I am comparing Obama to a monkey when all I was really trying to say was, “Obama talks crap.” I am also sure that when Bush was in that same picture found all over the web, Sharpton wasn’t around for comment.

I don’t know why Sharpton, still has credibility these days, Have we forgotten his pet project that blasted him into the limelight, the Tawana Brawley Case? You surely remember that young girl who told the world that she was raped by nine white guys and they even drew on her with human feces? He stood behind her for months as she told the world about her ordeal only for us to find out that she was lying and it never really happened.

Who was the man that went after Don Imus for telling a bad joke, Al, oh yeah, that Al is one bad mother, hey I’m just talking about Al. Large corporations donate to the Sharpton cause. Is it because they want to fight so called racism or is it to insure they won’t be a victim of the Al finger point?

Hattie Mac Daniel, Stephen Fetchet, and actors like these are denounced for their jobs. Haddy was the first black woman to win an Oscar and Stephen was one of the all time great comedians of his day but yet, we call it a racial stereotype. Today we have movies and television shows making a comeback with the likes of the Tyler Perry’s of the world using all the stereotypes of the last seventy five years but that’s ok. The double standard stops here.

Al, please, you are old school but that was torn down a few years back. I think it is time for the Al’s of those days to just go back from where they came.

Tonight Obama Speaks as Most of the Media Drools

Why is it everytime Obama speaks, the Dow heads downhill? I will tell you why. The stock market rallies when good news is announced, however, Obama, and his cabinet or various new committees, seems to be on every day now talking down America. “Our souls are broken, we are cowards, we are racists, and we will fail.”

Today we are expecting Obama to speak again only it will be after the Market closes. The Dow and other markets rallied so go figure. Is this what he wants to happen one can only wonder?

It seems that what was once message of hope and change turned to doom and turmoil in the Obama camp. It is important to rally around the flag and not burn it. So where’s all the pep talks, where is the hope or the change?

If Washington is known as” the Father of our Country,” and Reagan is known as the great communicator,” what Obama should be thinking of is his place in history. Will he be known as “The Bamboozler”? Yes he is the first Blackman to hold the office but does he want to be known as “the first Blackman who brought down America?”

He is quickly becoming known as the man who gives to the poor or the takers, loafers, ignorant, and steals from the righteous. I am willing to bet, that tonight Obama will once again say something that will crash the stock exchange again. So once again I ask where the patriotism is.

I am so tired, tired from the double talking media, and the twisted minds who now call themselves our leaders. Arrogant people are afraid of real change; they want things as they want it and won’t budge on a single issue.

I am sure Obama’s pals over at MSNBC and the other real news stations, owned by GE will kiss up his speech tonight and spin it their way no matter what, after all, they are in love with the guy but love doesn’t get ratings truth does. Obama, the one term president, maybe that’s what he will be known as.

I saw a poll on one of these so called news stations. It said, “How do you tonights Obama speech will go”, and people voted on it. No doubt, the same people who expect the Obama handouts will help them retire early. 65 percent voted that his speech will go well, 33 percent said his speech will be good, and the rest said his speech, well they just didn’t know. i didn’t vote but if I needed to guess, I would say, it would go great is teleprompted, not so well if he wings it.

Well, its all over but the shouting. Obama said he gets it did I miss the part where he was going to pay 150 Billion dollars for 15 choppers? May I also add, the counties all across America that were not Obama supporters, GET NOITHING, revenge is all his.

All and all, he gave a good speech, he only fumbled a few of his lines. So as he spends a hell of a lot of money he also stated that he will cut spending. Maybe his nick name will be Mr. Flipenflopen.

One bit of advice Mr. Obama, you can no longer play the Bush Blame Game, because it is now your war in Afganistan. You can no longer blame Bush because you just out spent the last seven presidents total.
Ok folks, lets all put on MSNBC and see what real slobbering looks like.

Obama is Paying for Votes

So, Mr. Obama is on the box again, telling us how lucky we are to be getting thirteen bucks extra every week in our pay. The dog parks, the Frisbee fields and the field mice are getting more then that which tells us just where we stand in Obama’s eyes.

He is going to help all of those who are failing to pay for a home they should have never have been approved for in the first place. In my book THE WHITE HOUSE MAFIA found only at my book store at the following address questions our government and they are not cool with it. So, Mr. Obama is on the box again, telling us how lucky we are to be getting thirteen bucks extra every week in our pay. The dog parks, the Frisbee fields and the field mice are getting more then that which tells us just where we stand in Obama’s eyes.

When so many are losing their jobs, how can they afford rent? Are the bulk of the people renting going to get help? We all know by now that he never thought this out but it is too late. I guess we can take the thirteen dollars and give that to the landlord and tell him, that’s all we got.

The normal people of the land need money, jobs or both. All the banks and auto makers in the world won’t survive until we get help, real help. Obama, you can take my book off the market because you seem to believe in censorship, but as long as I am alive, I will keep publishing it even is I have to print the book myself in a dark basement.

When so many are losing their jobs, how can they afford rent? Are the bulk of the people renting going to get help? They are not. We all know by now that he never thought this out but it is too late. I guess we can take the thirteen dollars and give that to the landlord and tell him, that’s all we got.

The normal people of the land need money, jobs or both. All the banks and auto makers in the world won’t survive until we get help, real help. Obama, you can take my book off the market because you seem to believe in censorship, but as long as I am alive, I will keep publishing it even is I have to print the book myself in a dark basement.

He is going to help all of those who are failing to pay for a home they should have never have been approved for in the first place. In my book THE WHITE HOUSE MAFIA found only at my book store at the following address questions our government and they are not cool with it.

Haleigh Cummings~My Psychic Reading

The day this child went missing I saw that something was not lining up. I see the child as alive. The father, Ronald Cummings was working at the time the child was missing. His live in girlfriend of 17 was in charge of the children.

The girlfriend would sneak out once again in the name of fun, and always come home before the Childs father would. She knows the routine so well and has done this before. Earlier that morning, the seventeen year old has a relative over. He stole something from the home and the small childs father would discover it missing. They argued and the relative would walk away angry only to wait until the father would go to work. He was heading towards the home where he hid in the shadows and the seventeen year old was spotted leaving the home.

The relative would head over to the home still angry and found the door unlocked. He went in and sought revenge. He took the child and simply drove away. They were spotted in Knoxville but will be found on Tuesday Feb. 24th, ten miles before Nashville in a small community. The relative is trying to sell the child.

When we place our children in the hands of children, sometimes it’s as if we just don’t care but other times it is what we have to do. The seventeen year old girl living with the Father of these small children will be charged with obstruction. She will say that she is sorry but she just didn’t want her man to find out that she left the home. The girl will be found and all will get what is coming to them.

Update: I am tired, weak and heading home after scoing out a lot of things. This poor little girl was suposed to have been returned by now. Their are a few people keeping secrets and they just wont understand how important that is to this missing soul. They wont find her if all the puzzle parts are not handed to the people putting this jig saw together.

Some people close to this case are afraid of losing what they have but at what cost? If these people don’t do the right thing and soon, little Haleigh will be found but like so many others it will be too late.

The panic is in and some will act in haste. I am pleeding for the three people that know things but who are not telling the true facts to do so now. You know who you are. I am just so tired.

A Helping Hand for Nadya Suleman

Nadya Suleman now a mom of fourteen children. America and the world for that matter have way too much time on their hands. The woman is receiving death threats, and the people that are supposed to be helping her are turning their backs on her.

Many of us know how it feels to have no one on our side. I am sure Nadya knows the feeling so well by now. So what, she wants and loves children, why are we obsessed with stopping her from doing what she wants in the greatest country in the world.

Nadya is excepting donations as many do on the net. Give or don’t give, your choice, but you really don’t have the right to judge anyone. Soon she will have no place to live. Do you realize that others in her situation are given so much in donations, diapers, food, furniture, because people want to help in that way?

We should be bowing our heads in shame for the way we are treating others in a time of need. Yes we place ourselves in situations at times but do not deserve to be stoned for it.

I only hope, Nadya gets the right people behind her. Dad on Oprah and Mom on the news chastising her doesn’t help at all. Some say, the taxpayers will foot this bill, and so what, we have just given a man a trillion to spend on what he wishes to. If we still have a heart we will help this woman, if we don’t then move on because I just don’t want to know someone like you. We help the Animals, the poor, and the hungry, but we are acting like a mob, a clique when it comes to this fellow American struggling. We all make mistakes, we are not perfect.
Nadya, site for those who have a heart.